Gracious by Kelly Williams Brown

Author:Kelly Williams Brown
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Potter/Ten Speed/Harmony/Rodale
Published: 2017-03-15T00:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER FIVE

Gracious In, Around & Generally Regarding The Home

One time, after relaying to my mother how impressed I was by my then-boyfriend’s apartment,1 she nodded matter-of-factly.

“Well,” she said, “the Dutch are very house-proud.”

This delighted me. One, I believe it is okay to make sweeping, benign generalizations about northern European countries.2

Two, it was the first time I’d ever heard that wonderful phrase “house-proud”—so simple! Two syllables packed with nuance! I love it and use it all the time.

I can’t speak to my mother’s statement on personal habitat pride as a trademark of the Dutch, but I suppose it seems right. A people who had a historically important tulip mania probably still have a culture of keeping things neat.

I’m someone who has not, historically, been particularly house-proud. House-anxious, house-despairing, house-shamed, house–HOW DID ALL THESE FRUIT FLIES GET IN HERE; GOOD GOD THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF THEM; NOW A BUNCH ARE IN MY MOUTH BECAUSE I WAS YELLING!, yes. House-proud, not so much.

But now I am. I love walking into my house every time, because it’s mine and because I’ve learned a lot of valuable lessons in my ongoing cold war with fruit flies.3

Of course, the first half of that statement is what makes my house important to me and worth caring for and making into a place that I both love and like.

Remember how in every chapter I’ve hammered on the fact that we can’t do anything to change other people’s behavior? Or life happenings, generally? And all we can do is the right action within our power?

Well, your house is yours, and you get to control this little space (perhaps the only space in the world under your purview!) and shape it and make it into what you want. And even if you don’t like it right now, you probably love it for the following reasons:

1.It keeps you warm and dry when you sleep!

2.It contains almost everything you own and love!

3.People whom you don’t care for are not allowed to come inside! Usually!

4.It is the only place you can waft about naked or cry/rage/scream/throw a glass for dramatic effect, say the filthiest things, AND watch every single episode of My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding without being judged.4

Graciousness at home is the exact same thing as graciousness anywhere else—simple but not easy, something that you can always practice again and again. Dedicate yourself to whatever is in front of you, whether that’s a guest or a pile of clean laundry. And yes, you can certainly do the bare minimum for both of those, but I would always recommend taking a little bit of extra time to do it well. You have to fold those clothes anyway—why not take a few more seconds per garment and lovingly fold them in a tidy, satisfying way?

When you are present and mindful in an environment filled with things you don’t resent, you see it. You pay attention to it, and this attention leads to the ability to stave off chaos with minimal fuss. If this

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.